intriguing anecdote, brethren

I wish my feelings and emotions have a shut-off valve, that way it’s easy for me to just turn everything off so it’s not hard for me seeing you treat me like a friend while I see you more than that. I know your feelings faded and as much as I wanna try so hard to get them back, I don’t know how. I think this is the end of our chapter, the end of an era. It sucks to say how much we have lost, memories are different from realities. I don’t wanna see my life in some kind of a television screen, I want to be in it. But I know there’s no more chances, no more hopes. I have gotten used to being with you, now, I have to get used to being without you. I swallowed my pride, but my body just keeps forcing it back out. I don’t wanna lose you as a best friend, but sometimes we just gotta let go of the things we love so it doesn’t hurt us. I have lost you once, I have lost you twice, it doesn’t matter if I lose you the third time since I know that you no longer look for me. I remember how hard you try to reach me whenever I don’t answer, but now, you’re the one that doesn’t even do any effort to reply back, and it just breaks my heart even more. For who knows what you’re doing. Well, I’m done sticking around, I’m just gonna keep hurting myself if I force myself to you.